It was Friday afternoon when I got the message: "Nicolas 2nd Absence warning: At 3 you will be removed form TSA". It shocked me. I had just realised that I had missed the weekly TSA meeting at lunch, and now if I missed another one, I would be removed from the club I had to do an exam, interview and essay in order to get in. I didn't do it on purpose, I had just completely forgotten that there was a meeting. These types of situations occur to me very frequently and they also occur to me outside of school with easy tasks, like forgetting to pick up a friend or forgetting to tell my mom I'm going out, and now I've realised I must change this, and do it NOW!
This has been one of my worst qualities since I was very little and It has really started to affect me, not only because I miss appointments or deadlines, but because my image gets affected. People might think that I am not very considerate of others, or that I give more importance to other things than what people ask me to do, and most importantly, I become a less trustworthy person because people know they can't depend on me or think I can't get a job done. It really frustrates me because these are the least of my intentions or what I want people to think of me, yet that's what I prove, and I don't like to give excuses to justify my errors. Now that it's clear to me how it affects me, I have come to conclude the reason why this happens, and it all boils down to one word: oblivious. By definition, oblivious means: not aware of or not concerned about what is happening around one. This couldn't more clearly describe me, as it is pure awareness of my surroundings that I'm lacking, but, why does it happen? Well, there are two main factors that come into play here. The first one is simply due to genetics, I believe, because the same happens to most of my brothers and my mother. The second reason, which is the one I am most concerned about, is because of high school. In high school, there is lots of work to do, as well as pressure to do well, therefore I have been forced to prioritise my school work and give less time to think about other things, which makes makes me forget specific thoughts. When I constantly carry different thoughts in my mind, the most vulnerable I am to forgetting things. In order to change this inability of mine, I am going to try to organize myself through calendars and cellphone remainders. In addition I will talk to my family, which has members with the same problems as I do, and brainstorm ideas to see what we can do to mutually cooperate and solve this problem as a group. This way, I hope to become less oblivious, and more present in the moment.
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